The Monthly Chat

August, 2008

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Printable bits of wisdom, ideas, and reflections for your friends and
homeschool group, from the members of HomeschoolClassifieds.com
Opinions expressed are those of the individual authors.
©1997-2009 HomeschoolClassifieds.com, Knoxville, TN

Other
A Godly Help Meet

My two older children were very focused on getting married. They would talk about whom they liked, and when they would start courting, be engaged, and marry thereafter.

It started to concern me because it seemed to be a carnal desire rather than a spiritual direction. I believe God gave me these thoughts as I addressed the subject with them:

Look at life as if you are writing two essay assignments.
One is about your courting/marriage future and the other is about your walk with God. As you live it, or are trying to reach for a goal in that area, the essay is being ''written''.

If you focus on the essay about your walk with God, your spiritual strength, and your relationship with Him, He will give you the answers to the other assignment. The ideas and the plans for your courting/marriage essay will all fall into place. Then both essays will be perfect ''A'' assignments.

If you try to focus on the courting assignment, you are prone to neglect the essay about your walk with God.

With the thought of marriage always at the forefront of their minds, how easy it would be to fall into a very unhappy relationship because we had it all figured out, through fleshly desire. Rather, let’s let God figure it out and then follow His direction.

I explained to them that it's not as much about attraction, rather: Can I make him/her happy? Can I be a good homekeeper/provider? Will I be able to be understanding of his/her needs and am I strong enough in my own spiritual walk that I would be able to help him/her pray through a time of spiritual battle?

This is a time for them to devote to the spiritual side of their lives in preparation for a Godly marriage. What a beautiful relationship it will be, being a true help meet -- a strength and an encouragement to each other.

momma4ducks

Organization/time management
Books - to Keep or Not to Keep

I have a lot of books. I have too many books! What is a good homeschooling mom to do? I've been mulling this over for quite a while. Here is what I've come up with.

Evaluate: How long will it be before I will need this again? (There is seven years between the 3rd and 4th child here; that is a long time to save a common book)

Am I totally certain that the next child will use this? I have some books that I will assign to my children just because I think they are valuable. Other books we have just because they were a preference of that child.

Don't save common books. Even if they are 'good' books. For instance my two middle boys were VERY into boxcar children books. For a while I started collecting them. They took up a good deal of space on our shelves. But the boys don't read them any more (finally!). When my now four-year-old is ready, I'll have him read one. If he really wants them, we will just get them again. I've noticed that you can find this series everywhere so I decided to trade them out on PaperBackSwap.com. I gave some people a GREAT deal.

Collect hardback versions of favorites, even if I already have it. Then I'll get rid of the paperback. I have a thing for a good sturdy book. I love to find popular books in an older hardback version.

Save anything that I might read to my grandchildren. Yes I'm already planning on grandchildren. You never know what the future holds.

You know what? As practical as all that sounds it still HURTS to get rid of books. Can anyone else relate?

My husband said the nicest thing to me the other night. We were talking about moving. Which led to the thought of all the stuff we have. I quietly asked, ''what will we do with my books?'' And you know what he said? ''We'll have to just box them up and ship them''. I got right up and gave him a big hug.

momn4boys

Organization/time management
How I Organized My Homeschool Library

I finally organized my 1,330 books in a way that lets the family find them easily and put them away properly. I was sick of the kids getting interested in a topic and having to tell them, ''I know we have a book about that, but where?''

1. I obtained all the shelving I could.

2. I decided on categories. I wanted them specific enough to find books when needed, yet broad enough that there wouldn't be only a few per category. Examples: Board Books, Language and Sign Language, History and Geography, Sonlight 1, Homeschooling Theory/Practice.

Some books fit more than one category, so I pick where I need them most. Books used with our curriculum might be history-related and chapter books, but I label them Sonlight 1 because I need them with the curriculum.

3. I cataloged my books by registering for a free Amazon.com ''Your Media Library'' account and entering ISBN numbers. It has a spot to note the location of the book; this is where I enter my self-named category.

4. I obtained colored dot, star and other stickers. The cheap brands actually stick better; just make sure they're labeled permanent or test one.

I color code my books, but you could use a certain number of strips or dots to indicate each category instead.

5. I applied the stickers to the books' spines. I put the bottom of each sticker one inch from the bottom so they would be neat when all in a row on the shelves.

6. I tried to assign one or two shelves per category of book, then put the books on the correct shelf.

7. I printed the list of categories and stuck an actual sticker from that category on the paper next to the appropriate name as a key.

8. I will also label shelves so my family can find books at a glace without having to check the key each time.

suebattel

Bible & Spiritual growth
Romans 12:2

''Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God's will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.''

After three years of homeschooling I decided to throw in the towel. The keyword here is ''I''. Surely I couldn't provide the social stimulation my children needed or the activities, such as cheerleading, sports, home economics, band, etc. (never mind that they were only in grade school). High school was coming soon and I wasn't going to keep my kids from these ''necessities'' of life.

Imagine my surprise when my five-year-old came home with a colorful four letter word he learned at school. And he called our dog this word just as nonchalantly as if he were saying ''good boy''. I then realized that he didn't know he was saying anything wrong. My children hadn't learned any of this language from home and didn't know a bad word from a good word.

Then God started messing with me. He let me know where my children belonged -- at home where I can teach them His words and ways, not the ways of the world. They will have the rest of their lives to learn that and make decisions whether to follow them or not. But at least for now, I can teach them which decisons are the right and give them wisdom with which to make these choices.

God confirmed my decision to homeschool again. When I spoke with my children about it, I was afraid they would balk at the idea of homeschooling again. After all they had made new friends and gotten into the ''routine'' of school. But the comments I recieved were ''yea!'' , ''good, I'd rather be homeschooled'' and ''I'm glad because my friends at school treat other girls mean.'' So much for my wisdom!

So don't rely on your own wisdom or the kind advice of others who think you've lost your mind. Follow what God puts in your heart-let His will be done and be ''pleasing and perfect'' in His sight.

hcinfo

Other
You Can Do It

I've heard too many people say that they feel inadequate to homeschool their children. I always tell them that that is a tool that Satan uses to discourage us from doing what we should be doing. Take heart and take it one day at a time (sometimes one minute at a time). It will all work out. There are so many resources available, plus advice from others. Take the time to find out about it. You are smarter than your children (for the time being) and you can do it!

heathersuem

Other
A Smile Goes a Long Way

Our pool store will test our water sample that we bring in for free and make any needed recommendations to bring the chemicals up to well...perfect. If you get a perfect pool test, you get this little smiley face at the upper right hand corner of your test results. We have had our pool for I guess eight summers. Do you realize all that needs to be in balance to get a perfect test?

Dragging my feet, shoulders slumped, I took my weekly sample in, and anticipated the technician's question: ''how does it look?'' ''Fine, I guess,'' I answered in a groan. The tech asks, ''have you drained your pool recently?'' ''Well,'' he said, ''your stabilizer has come down considerably. You have a perfect pool.''

I scared the kid! Jumping up and down, hugging him, running from the store yelling, telling everybody my news.

I though of all the applications that has for life!
*All the hard work, finally realized, for a smiley face.
*Encouragement goes a long way. That smiley face boosted my self esteem. It turned my frown - upside down.

If I can get so excited about a ''perfect'' pool, that is small compared to all that God has done that I can be jumping up and down sharing with anyone who will listen.

At the end of my life, I want God to put a smiley face on the upper right hand corner of my life test and say, ''Well done, good and faithful servant!''

Teachers/parents, give your student/child smiley faces often! The greatest motivator for my younger kids was a sticker -- they would work very hard for it. Now that they are older, it is money, but a hug, time with us, and ''well done'' puts a smile on their face too.

hypermusicmom

Other
Rain Gutter Book Shelves

This is not a new idea but it's an easy way to display your picture books so you can see the covers.

Buy a length of plastic rain gutter from a home improvement store (including the end caps) and cut it to any length you like. It can be installed easily with screws, and only took us about an hour from start to finish. Looks great if you have several ''shelves'' on a large wall. We installed these beside my son's bed and we can change out books from our large collection. Looks great and the books actually get read!

shawne

Marriage & parenting
A Home Full of Jerks

Our home is full of jerks - Praise God!

We have been reading as a family the book Practical Happiness: A Young Man's Guide to a Contented Life by Bob Schultz as part of our family devotion time. At the end of yesterday's reading I read just the title of today's reading, which was ''Jerks''. We all smiled and chuckled and wondered what that would be about.

Well, we were in for a treat. The author writes ''After decades of watching families, I've discovered a trait that appears in every successful home. I'm convinced that no matter how great the family, without this particular element, they will have a serious fall. The common thread running through successful families is this: there's a jerk in every one of them. Not only is there a jerk in every family, in the top notch families every member is a jerk!

After peels of laughter from all of us, we read on...

''The wonder of Christianity, the good news of the gospel, is that a bunch of jerks can learn to love each other. They can stick up for one another, forgive each other, and cover for the other's mistakes. A pack of jerks, under the influence of God's Spirit, lives in harmony and accomplishes many useful and good works together.'' page 28.

''Loving jerks is basic Christianity. It's God's heart. A family who loves sinners, especially those in their own home, experience joy in the middle of problems. They know the security that comes with acceptance in the midst of failure.'' page 29

How encouraging to know we have a faithful God who loves us and hears our prayers for our marriages and children. May the Lord bless this family of jerks as we learn to love each other.

audreym

Homeschool helps
Our Life in Homeschooling

I have been homeschooling for 12 years. I am entering my last year with my baby. My son is in his second year of college with a 4.0 GPA. I am very proud of him and my daughter. They both have done well and they both desire to homeschool their own children as life permits.

If you are just starting out, know that it is hard. It has been the hardest thing I have ever done. But, it has been the best thing I have ever done. The most rewarding thing I have ever done. If I could do it all over again, I would. Get up every day and ask for God's help and you can make it. He will give you the grace you need every day.

angieinms

Homeschool helps
Don't Dumb It Down for Me.

The other day my brother-in-law mentioned a story in the news about a green puppy. My daughter asked how it became green, and he said it was born that way. A few minutes later he told the same story to my sister and she asked the same question. This time he explained in detail the theory that the placenta's greenish color rubbed off on the puppy's coat in the womb. Our daughter (age five) asked, ''Why didn't you just tell me that?''

Kids are short, and we assume they can't understand. In the name of making information age-appropriate, we go too far and dumb it down. I'd say the entire philosophy that we share for educating our children is based on the idea that they can understand. Maybe they don't catch every detail, but we expose them to all the facts.

People are often surprised at the things that come out of our daughter's mouth — that she knows moths are nocturnal while butterflies are diurnal, and so on. While we think she is bright, other kids are just as intelligent. The difference is that we bother to give her real information.

This morning she was still thinking about the story of Daniel in the lion's den, which I read to her from ''Egermeier's Bible Story Book'' last week (great book!). She wanted to know why when she has heard the story before in other books or at Sunday School, they simply say that the men were jealous of Daniel, when really there's a lot more to the story.

We had a good chance to discuss this idea of dumbing things down for kids. It really bothers her. While she hasn't verbalized it this way, it seems as if she feels she is being cheated out of information just because she is a kid.

Our daughter told me, ''Someday when I grow up, if I am a teacher, I'll tell my kids the whole, whole, whole story!''

suebattel

Homeschool helps
My Baby Grew Up!

This summer, our eldest ''graduated'' from home high school. The funny thing is, it doesn't feel like it. We've taught her at home all her life and have celebrated big moments with her, like her first step, her first word, learning to ride a bike, her first chapter book, her first recital, her driver's license - just to name a few.

Hopefully we've instilled a love of learning in her, so she'll want to continue to grow in stature and knowledge. So moving from high school to college seems a rather artificial celebration. Now I'm waiting to help her furnish her first home away from our family home. That will warrant a celebration. And a few tears.

pammylbear

Homeschool helps
Relaxing While Homeschooling a Pre-Schooler

A friend recently wrote me asking for advice on how to ''homeschool'' her four-year-old daughter. Here is what I shared with her.

The best thing to do at this age is read to them. This will develop their speech and vocabulary. That is, of course, if you read stories that have good vocabulary - like the original Beatrix Potter books. They have adorable illustrations and are rich in vocabulary.

When reading, I would recommend that you stop to discuss whenever she leads you to, or when you feel you need to explain something. This will usually be a word that she does not know. Be sure you start using it in your day to day talking with her - she will too.

Acting out stories is a great way for them to connect with the story and learn how to put themselves in others' shoes. They learn to think of how others may feel in a given situation.

I also like to find books with beautiful illustrations - this is a great introduction to art. Talk about the picture, what time of day does it appear to be, etc. Then, draw with her.

As far as math, the basics of counting are all you need right now. Practice counting with her over and over. Then try going backward - start easy, like from 3 or 5. Remember, the actual numerals (0-9) are random shapes that are used to represent a concrete concept. Having her learn the numbers is fine, but more importantly have her help you with real-life math. I have a box that I've labeled ''Hands On Math'' where I keep manipulatives as well as easy math games and activities. Remember, kids this age learn by playing.

anicorey

Marriage & parenting
How to Make Your Husband Smile

Skooch over and sit in the middle on the bench seat in your truck using the middle seat belt.

Even if it means that you have to twist your legs around so you won't be in the way of the stick shift. Especially when there are no kids or carseats with you, so there really is no reason you have to skooch over. Even when you are just going to Home Depot and not on a special date or anything.

All of these actions will speak love to the important man in your life.

(Note: This message has been endorsed by the editor, who now wishes he still had a truck with a bench seat.)

momn4boys

Organization/time management
This Became a Problem for Me

I have been homeschooling for most of the past ten years except for two years when I put my kids in a charter school after moving. Now I must say that this year is probably my last for homeschooling providing things go the way they have been. I would like to share some mistakes I've made that made my homeschooling experience more difficult than it needed to be.

Debt - This is a biggie and I know better, but needless to say, I wanted to homeschool so I did what I had to do to get us by. I am married and my husband is a great worker --unfortunately neither of us is great at money management and we got in a little over our heads. We did not buy big expensive things but it was the smaller things (like homeschool books!) that became difficult. So, things like taxes, insurance, books, sometimes a bill or so, went on the credit card. Big no-no, but we were between a rock and a hard place. Couldn't stand the thought of any more public school felt like I was feeding my kids to wolves! Couldn't afford Christian school so there we were.

Busyness - due to the above situation. Had to look for outside jobs to do to try to avoid more debt. The bad thing was I was becoming too busy and taking my kids all different places while I would clean, or try to do school on the way, or later at night. That was very hard on them and me. Now I am in a position where I ''have'' to work but can not give adequate time to my precious jewels. But, they are in a great Christian school very close by.

I just wanted to share these thoughts. Maybe it will help someone else not to make the same mistake.

ted2dee2

Special needs
Who is Teaching Whom?

In teaching two children with very real, and very different, special needs, I often find myself a bit out of sorts, or wits, or something like that. At these times, I do a subconscious thing where I thow up my hands...kind of a helpless ''I give up'' sort of stance.

Then, out of nowhere, just like a rainbow at the end of a storm ( and can we have storms!), one of these 100% hands-on, unpredictable and difficult (to say the least) special children comes up and says the most profound amazing thing I have ever heard.

I have read a LOT, and heard a lot...but somehow, in these precious little moments of profound wisdom, I see God smiling...I don't feel so much like a frustrated teacher or mommy. I just feel a little closer to eternity. And I ask myself, who is teaching whom here?

rebekahmmata

Homeschool helps
It Matters Who Governs

Please consider:

My heart is forever grateful to our Nation's founding fathers and the wisdom they used. They weren't perfect men, but the Government they established was amazing and I believe only possible for them to understand because of the help they received from God.

Living in America has provided me with a lifetime of opportunity and I am also grateful for that. I am certain that if I had been born and remained in any other country, my life wouldn't be as great as it is here.

I want my children and their children to have the same kind of hopes, dreams and freedoms that my generation, and the generations before me have had.

I want my children to be mindful of the sacrifices and personal levels of responsibility others have maintained in order to establish and preserve this land.

It is our obligation to be active in leading and selecting leadership that honors the founding fathers and our heavenly Father.

If the righteous don't govern, than who does that leave? It doesn't leave anyone I want making decisions over the lives of my children.

homeschoolersunderground

Organization/time management
Get with God

My best year of homeschooling happened when I chose to go to a hotel overnight and just ''get with God.'' I spent the time reading the Bible, talking to God, and giving everything to Him. Then I just listened with a notebook nearby and wrote down the thoughts I had.

I was way too busy the year before, and needed guidance on how/what activities to let go. I was able to make the weekly things I did outside of the home become every 10 days instead, which helped a lot. Then I was able to be led in all the courses I would do with each of my kids for the following year, as well as what they could be involved in (if they wanted to) that I could manage. I even made a chore list for each child...and some marriage-related resolutions on which I needed to focus.

All in all, it was a wonderful time with the Lord, a great time to give everything to Him. That year was generally more peaceful than any year I had, homeschooling-wise. I would encourage anyone to do the same -- Prov. 3:5-6.

joyus